Being introspective is dangerous.

(The following statements are vague because I shouldn't give full details)

I'm one of those people who thinks...a lot.
I think about so many things that I people will never even get to hear.
When it's just you and yourself it can get very scary. Because there's no external perspective imposed on your thoughts. There is only the one way you think about it, and the severe extreme opposite that surfaces to counteract it: doubt.
Doubting is very very bad...but unfortunately there's no way to control it.
And once you start doubting you just keep doubting more and more and more, until you've dug yourself into so deep into a hole that it is impossible to get out.

I had a breakdown tonight. A really awful one.
And if things hadn't gone well for me, I would be back in the same state of being that I was about three or so years ago.

I hate the fact that I'm writing this, partly because it's cliché blog material.
But perhaps it has a place here, since it's food for thought--and that's what I originally made this for (besides having a nice orderly record of everything that happens).

Anyway...I'll shut up about all this now.

I've been reading The Magus, and I like it so far (within the first 20 pages it was quite obvious why Neurocam has an interest in it).

It's a very unique book, and it's written in such a style that I'm really not quite used to yet, but that's part of why I like it.

I haven't gotten any more correspondence from Maxwell Knight, Charles Hastings, or Bridget Fischer regarding assignments and the like--beyond a nice little "thank-you" from Mr. Knight after I sent him some more specific (but general) information about where I am in LA.

So that's all that comes to mind right now. I'm really tired, and still have a lot of work to get done.